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Wonder of Wonder, Miracle of Miracles.

I just had an ah-ha, whilest scrubbing my teeths.

I am emersed in Jewish and mystical study, and the study of spiritual and religious practices of the world, more now than ever as I write my Sabbath Queen show. There is so much to know, so much to learn, and for this lifelong student, I'm in hog heaven.

As a child, I always loved to learn. Moreso about people, and from people and situations, and less from a textbook. Looking back now, I think I thought the constant need for information wasn't the right way for a person to be. Maybe a teacher at school once told me to stop asking questions in class one day. Or maybe my line of questioning in different situations was provocative. Or maybe people didn't like always being under a microscope having to talk about themselves. Or ... I dunno.

Here is my ah-ha: Judaism is a path where you may still not have learned everything even as you take your last breath. Prayers, Hebrew, stories, holidays and festivals, practices, commentaries, customs. The irony is astounding to me, that I am learning and questioning and deepening my understandings about Judaism right now as I write my show, and live life, and meet new people, and I am completely unapologetic about it. 

I've landed in the best place someone like me could land. Willy Wonka! 

I never really believed that "everything happens for a reason" far beyond something's happening, and shit, I have to deal. But if I step away, or step up, and see the novel of my life from an eagle's view, I now see my journey as pure, guided, and sensible. I see it as purposeful and on time. And might I add, happening for a reason. 

I believe the world needs, at the very least, a bridge between Judaism and Christianity, and light shining on what we have come to believe as differences. I also believe that Peace within comes from understanding our self. And Peace in the world comes from understanding our neighbor. And that is what I am living and doing, by writing, and sharing my stories, and putting this show out there. And asking questions, And just being who I am ... Who else can I be? 

Thank you, almost-fifty!

It is a miracle, truly, to reflect in this way.  I stand in wonder of the twists and turns and decisions of my life to this point. And I never forget what my mom said once, that no matter what, I "always land on my feet." I have, and I do and I need that landing to walk forward. I need those roots from which to draw my strength. And I, like the eagle, also have an alternate perspective as I fly above myself, and see a line in a map showing the trail I've taken so far. 

From Fiddler on the Roof (because the song popped into my head and then I wrote this blog post. And because ... Jewish):

But of all God's miracles large and small,
The most miraculous one of all
Is the one I thought could never be:
God has given you to me.

God, Life, Love, Family, The Presence - The happier I become, the more authentically I can say Thank you to everyone and everything. You were given to me so I may be wonderful in my living, so I may understand what a miracle is. So I may fulfill my purposes. 

I, too, was given to you. 

We are wonderous miracles given to each other.

I am grateful I'm not having a crisis; I'm glad my midlife awakening is not asking that I get a sports car. That shit is expensive! I'm content in doing the high-speeding instead soaring high up in the air, eagle-style. Yeah, definitely. Because also, you know the traffic nowadays, Oy. 

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